David Beckham reckon's Stevie Wonder's great

SWOONING soccer star David Beckham is human after all and has given Stevie Wonder the thumbs-up. He even asked his wife to take a snap of him with the music legend.Becks told BBC Radio that he was also left in awe by Nelson Mandela and Muhammad Ali, and added that Stevie Wonder's 1972 hit Superstition was his favourite song. Becks said that, when he met the blind singer, "he turned round to me and said, it was quite funny, he said: 'If you could teach me to play football, then you'd be some player'. You know, those sort of moments you cherish. It's quite embarrassing because I was like turning round to (wife) Victoria and saying: 'I really want a picture but I can't ask him'." Victoria Beckham – Posh in the Spice Girls – eventually had to ask for the photograph.

Carrie Fisher Dating Rushdie

Former STAR WARS actress CARRIE FISHER has sparked rumors of a romance with British author SALMAN RUSHDIE, after they were spotted in London enjoying a cozy meal together.
The odd couple recently dined together at posh London restaurant The Ivy and according to reports, Fisher, 51, couldn't keep her hands off 60-year-old Rushdie.
The controversial writer is currently in the process of divorcing his wife of three years, model/actress Padma Lakshmi, following their split in July (07).

The Heartbreak Kid (2007) (HD DVD)

Eddie Cantrow (Ben Stiller) isn't the type to settle down. It's not that he lives it up like it's Playboy After Dark, boozing it up with strippers and barely-legal co-eds or anything, but Eddie's so reluctant to bite the bullet and get married that he looks for just about any excuse to shove the women in his life to the sidelines. I mean, while rattling off the list of reasons why he broke it off with his fiancée of five long years, Eddie says it's a dealbreaker that she said she hated Caddyshack because the gopher looked too fake. He catches a lot of flak for being so non-committal -- and not even taking advantage of the whole bachelor thing -- by his his horndog pop (Jerry Stiller) and his married pal Mac (Rob Corddry), so when he meets-cute with Lila (Malin Akerman) after squaring off against a purse snatcher, Eddie throws out his usual playbook. They've only been dating about a month and a half when Lila drops a bombshell: the company she works for wants to ship her out to Rotterdam. Since the firm doesn't transfer married couples and seeing as how Eddie has a good thing going, he proposes. Whoops. Before they've even finished driving down to Cabo San Lucas for their honeymoon, Eddie realizes how little he actually knows about Lila, from untamed pubic hair to a violent, voracious sexual appetite to a deviated septum that sends damn near everything she puts in her mouth spewing out of her nostrils. Sure, he tries not to nitpick every last flaw, but it dawns on Eddie just how mismatched they are when he meets up with Miranda (Michelle Monaghan), the way too cool girl-next-door type in town for a family reunion. They hit it off instantly, but Eddie's stuck trying to worm his away around the fact that he's falling for another woman while he's on his honeymoon, so...y'know, hilarity ensues. Or, at least, hilarity's supposed to ensue, what with this being a comedy and everything. I'll admit that The Heartbreak Kid hooked me in at first -- Rob Corddry playing a miserable married man with a fake smile plastered across his balding mug, Eddie's stammering awkwardness around Lila as he fumbles with a pair of her panties in his sporting goods store, and really, just about every scene with Lila as they stumble their way down to Mexico. I hadn't really heard of Malin Akerman up until The Heartbreak Kid hit theaters, but this is the sort of balls-out, completely fearless performance that'd make her a star...if the movie hadn't floundered at the box office, I mean. Akerman may be the drop-dead gorgeous starlet type, but she completely embraces all of the repulsive aspects of her character, yet Lila always comes back with some hopelessly sweet scene where you can see why Eddie is reluctant to completely give her the boot. She's like an incontinent Yorkshire Terrier leaving a trail of piss from one end of the house to the other -- you kind of wanna kick her outside, but....oh, she's just so gosh-darn adorable. The Heartbreak Kid is almost a completely different movie once Michelle Monaghan strolls in as Bachelorette #2. With Lila shut up in their hotel room, only popping up for another quick gross-out comedy scene every ten or fifteen minutes, Ben Stiller steps away from playing the straight man in favor of something out of a more traditional romantic comedy. I liked the scenes with Miranda and her family -- everyone has a heckuva lot of chemistry together, and Ben Stiller plays off each and every one of 'em really well. So much of this stretch of the movie is cute and endearing, but funny...? Not so much. The laughs are pretty much all in the first 45 minutes or so. The Farrellys have been wading around in the PG-13 waters for a while, and their return to an R-rated comedy isn't exactly seamless. They don't shy away from the more crass stuff, but a lot of it's just witless vulgarity, rarely spinning off into an actual joke. I mean, think of Cameron Diaz in There's Something About Mary's money shot; just the idea of cum-in-the-hair in and of itself isn't all that funny, but it's what the Ferrellys did with that from there that earned such a huge laugh. Here, there's just a setup and no punchline. Eddie's 77 year old dad talks endlessly about "crushing pussy" and how "bitches be crazy", and he soaks in a hot tub with an aging, overinflated porn star. That's all there is to a lot of these jokes -- lame dialogue or some random situation that doesn't go anywhere -- and it flops and flounders. Even Lila's stuck with a lot of that as the movie goes on, like when she, uh, helps Eddie out with the old home remedy for a jellyfish sting. The gross-out is all there is to the gag. While I'm griping about The Heartbreak Kid's uneven, kind of anemic sense of humor, it's also worth mentioning that the comic void of Carlos Mencia is on the payroll as Uncle Tito, and...'nuff said there. I was really drawn in by The Heartbreak Kid at first, and the Farrelly Brothers have lined up just about a perfect cast. Clocking in right at two hours, the movie's just too long and doesn't serve up nearly as many laughs as it ought to, and the Farrellys' aren't back on steady footing with the whole R-rated comedy thing. A remake of a classic like Neil Simon's The Heartbreak Kid really shouldn't be this forgettable. Rent It. This HD DVD opens by noting that the movie has been edited for content. I know for sure that one of the extra snippets of footage that played over the end credits theatrically -- a payoff to Eddie's chat with Lila about his bunkmate in camp -- has been yanked out. Whether or not that's the only difference, I'm not 100% sure. Video: The Farrellys rave in the disc's audio commentary about how The Heartbreak Kid is their most beautifully photographed film yet, but it doesn't exactly shine in high-def. Presented at its theatrical aspect ratio of 2.39:1 and encoded using AVC, The Heartbreak Kid has a slightly soft, almost filtered look to it. The level of sharpness and detail are instantly recognizable as high definition, but this is one of the least striking HD DVDs I own of a movie fresh out of theaters. On the upside, film grain is never really intrusive, the image quality holds up better than average under low light, and there aren't any hiccups with speckling or the AVC compression. Its palette almost has an overcast look to it in the scenes in the Bay Area, although things are much brighter and more vividly saturated when The Heartbreak Kid moves its cameras south of the border. The quality is passable, and some of the close-ups and medium shots of the actors do look great, but The Heartbreak Kid just isn't in quite the same league as what I'm used to getting out of these next-gen formats for a day-and-date release. Audio: The Heartbreak Kid may sport a lossless Dolby TrueHD track, but it's still a standard issue comedy mix -- just about everything is anchored across the front channels, with the subwoofer disinterestedly twiddling its low-frequency thumbs and the surround channels reserved solely for light ambiance and to reinforce the music. At least The Heartbreak Kid does have a pretty solid soundtrack, heavy on vintage Bowie and including a couple of songs by The Flaming Lips as well. Still, the technical end of the audio is awfully bland, with neither the music, the recording of the dialogue, or the barely-there sound effects bolstered by all that much of a presence. The whole thing is almost aggressively mediocre. There are also Dolby Digital Plus 5.1 tracks in English, French, and Spanish, alongside subtitle streams in each of those languages and one in Portuguese for good measure. Extras: Dreamworks usually piles on the bells and whistles for their day-and-date releases in high definition, but the only high-def extra this time around is the theatrical trailer. Instead of throwing together your usual overly promotional making-of EPK, The Heartbreak Kid's featurettes are almost entirely centered around the cast and crew, especially the camaraderie on the set. The first half of "The Farrelly Brothers in the French Tradition" (17 min.) swirls around a bunch of the directors' botched business ventures and how they stumbled into the industry. As the two of them talk about their writing process and their loose, freeform directorial style, the mostly general discussion starts to relate more and more to The Heartbreak Kid specifically, marking their return to the whole R-rated comedy thing. The disc's other featurettes include "Ben and Jerry", a five minute piece on the two Stillers playing father and son on and off-screen, a quick look at the Halloween party on the set (including a shot of the Farrellys directing while dolled up like Jennifer Beals in Flashdance), and, um, eight minutes' worth of the proper strategy to pull off a convincing win in the cast-'n-crew's egg toss battles. The other extras are pretty much what you'd expect from a comedy straight out of theaters. The Farrelly Brothers chime in with an audio commentary, spending a good bit of time running through the music used throughout the film, distinguishing their remake from Neil Simon's darkly comedic original, noting the many background parts they auctioned off for charity, and discussing the delicate balancing act in not making Lila overly adorable or too easy to just throw out on her ass. Some of the other topics include a quick use of CGI in the "Operation" scene, the lack of a proper French word for "queef", the collaborative environment at Dreamworks (including one plot point suggested by Steven Spielberg), and gabbing about how the first assembly for Dumb and Dumber was screened at nearly four hours in length. This being a Farrelly commentary and all, it kinda goes without saying that they spend way, way, way too much time pointing out their friends and family in the background and noting who on the crew had worked on their other movies. I thought the whole thing was kind of dry, but it's alright leaving running in the background. There's a four minute gag reel, with a bunch of the usual clowning around, flubbed lines, and unused improvs. Rounding out the extras are six deleted scenes, running right around seven and a half minutes in total. There's nothing all that great in there, and the only particularly memorable bit is Miranda's ex from back home dropping in while she's in Cabo. For whatever reason, the unused sea lion brawl that the Farrellys mention in the movie's audio commentary isn't anywhere on here. Conclusion: Everything about this HD DVD release of The Heartbreak Kid is just alright -- its smattering of extras, the technical presentation, and, of course, the movie itself. Watchable but completely forgettable, The Heartbreak Kid coasts too much on the charms of its cast, and the Farrelly Brothers have spent so much time away from the R-rated comedy game that a lot of the movie's vulgarity feels forced and heavy-handed instead of...y'know, funny. Yeah, Malin Akerman is dynamite in it -- The Heartbreak Kid would've been a breakthrough role for her if anyone had actually seen it -- and Michelle Monaghan is as instantly likeable as ever, but nothing about the movie or its release on HD DVD amounts to anything more than a rental. Sorry. Rent It.

Celebrity A Place In The Sun to feature football star and ex Charlotte Mears

Danielle Lloyd would be advised to cover her face with her hands when new boyfriend Jermain Defoe kisses and cuddles his ex on national TV. The busty model – who's only been dating the football star for a month – won't want to see Jermain house-hunting with ex fiancée Charlotte Mears on Channel 4 show A Place In The Sun. The celebrity version of the popular series, due to be broadcast in the New Year, features the couple bidding on a £1.8 million house in Mallorca. Jermain and Charlotte were recorded on the Spanish island last summer and are shown talking on their mobiles cooing, 'Love you, lover'. Ouch. Danielle, 24, went public with her new romance on 13 December and is due to spend Christmas with Jermain, 25, at his family home in London.

What in the world . . . ?

The arrival of the Terracotta Army and Tutankhamun caught the public's imagination this year. But what about the arts community? We asked leading figures what painting, artefact or building they dream of bringing to Britain

Matthew Collings, Art critic
I would like to see the San Apollinare Nuovo, in Ravenna, transported over here. This is a sixth-century church. The mosaics are all high up in the air. The largest ones show dozens of men on one side of the building and dozens of women on the other. They carry crowns of victory. They look like Romans. They seem unclassifiable. They're actually vestal virgins and male martyrs, but the impression is dreamlike, the figures strangely large and vivid - 22 women and 26 men. They are a procession. Each line of figures - every one of them slightly different, every one facing in the same direction - ends up with images of Jesus and Mary. The three wise men and various angels are also part of the parade. Flowers, plants, folds in dresses, people's expressions, the direction of their gaze; their sandals, their hands, red caps if they are magi and wings if they are angels - everything fits in a single visual scheme. The overall decorative unity, its solemn beauty, is the moving thing.

What in the world . . . ?The arrival of the Terracotta Army and Tutankhamun caught the public's imagination this year. But what about the arts community? We asked leading figures what painting, artefact or building they dream of bringing to Britain Saturday December 22, 2007The Guardian Christopher Frayling's choice ... Grünewald's Isenheim altarpiece. Photograph: The Bridgeman Art Library
Matthew Collings, Art critic
I would like to see the San Apollinare Nuovo, in Ravenna, transported over here. This is a sixth-century church. The mosaics are all high up in the air. The largest ones show dozens of men on one side of the building and dozens of women on the other. They carry crowns of victory. They look like Romans. They seem unclassifiable. They're actually vestal virgins and male martyrs, but the impression is dreamlike, the figures strangely large and vivid - 22 women and 26 men. They are a procession. Each line of figures - every one of them slightly different, every one facing in the same direction - ends up with images of Jesus and Mary. The three wise men and various angels are also part of the parade. Flowers, plants, folds in dresses, people's expressions, the direction of their gaze; their sandals, their hands, red caps if they are magi and wings if they are angels - everything fits in a single visual scheme. The overall decorative unity, its solemn beauty, is the moving thing.


Article continues




In the sixth century, these virgins and saints would have been seen at Easter and on feast days after a singing and swaying procession through town, with the smell of incense, and the mosaic stones glinting in the candlelight, some images looming out and some in shadow. We see them with a very different mentality. But if there could ever be a system of existing that had loving your neighbour at the centre of it, I think this stuff would be a good advert for it.
Richard Eyre, Theatre director
In a small room at the Egyptian Museum in Cairo, away from the gods and goddesses, sacred animals, pharaohs and their queens, there is a small wooden statue dating from 2700 BC of a plump, bald man, carrying a tall walking stick. It was found in 1860 by some men working for a French archaeologist, who christened him Sheikh el-Balad because he looked like their village chief. It was subsequently called The Village Mayor and The Schoolmaster of Boulac, but now it's thought to be a statue of Ka-aper, a priest in charge of reciting prayers for the dead. As the guidebook says, politely drawing attention to his near pot belly, he was a man "who clearly enjoyed his food".
In any context, in any century, it's impossible not to be drawn to this sculpture, partly on account of its startling realism, but more for its humanity: among the colossal, formalist monuments, masks of mummies and memento mori, it's a shock to encounter something that's so alive. So much so that apparently its feet were chained by those who had commissioned it to keep it from walking off.
To look at this sculpture is to encounter a vigorous, intelligent, thoughtful and accessible man over a distance of 5,000 years. With its irreducible humanity, its uncontrived charm and its unassertive brilliance, it's a great work of art. Could there be a (temporary) swap - the statue of Ka-aper for the Rosetta Stone?
Christopher Frayling, Rector, Royal College of Art
So many. There are the complete works of Johannes Vermeer - not many of them, only 35 have been firmly attributed, but they have never been gathered in this country before. Unpretentious, domestic in subject matter and with an astonishing clarity of light, they would encourage calm and quiet reflection, and we certainly need that at the moment. And how about the self-portraits of Rembrandt, all 90 of them, presented in chronological order - the finest, most acute and self-aware visual representation of ageing in art history.
After a year like this one, when ageing has been widely mocked by politicians and political journalists, this would be a timely reminder of the beauty of the older human face without the aid of reconstructive surgery.
Then there's Matthias Grünewald's great Isenheim altarpiece, painted between 1512 and 1516, with its fold-out panels showing the temptation and sufferings of St Anthony as well as scenes from the New Testament, and its central terrifying image of the crucifixion - the most physical treatment of this barbaric form of execution I've ever seen. Today, we tend to think of art in hospitals as a comforting, reassuring thing: Grünewald's altarpiece, on the other hand, was intended to remind sufferers from skin diseases that there was always someone worse off than themselves, and that we suffer in the hope of better things. How about bringing that to London?
Above all, I'd like to see the entire Alhambra Palace, built in the late middle ages, transported from the hills of southern Spain to a suitable high place in Britain: pavilions, gardens, fountains, walls like carpets and ceilings like waterfalls - all the key elements of Islamic art and design, which have coexisted with Christian art above the city of Granada for all those years, and still have lessons for us today.
Tony Hall, Chief executive, Royal Opera House
Every time I stand before Ambrogio Lorenzetti's frescoes showing "good" and "bad" government in the Palazzo Pubblico in Siena, I relish the thinking that put them there at the heart of Sienese civic life in the late 1330s. At that time, the city was governed by the "Nine", citizens elected by lot who held office for only two months. There was no more radical form of government in the whole of Italy. They met in a room frescoed by Lorenzetti, entering beneath the figure of Justice, alongside a languid, sensuous, blue-robed Goddess of Peace. On the left-hand wall is a panorama of a well-governed Siena. There's music and dancing in a piazza, a man reading in a bookshop, flowers, a birdcage, and cured hams hanging in a shop window, much as they do today. Outside the city, farmworkers look after well-tended fields, and a rather fine black and white pig is prodded to market. But, says Lorenzetti, if you Nine screw up, look at the other wall. There the devil presides over a wintry Siena of disharmony and unpleasantness. I like the idea that those who govern us should be constantly reminded of the consequences of their actions. So let's take the frescoes first to Westminster, Edinburgh, Cardiff and Belfast, then to town halls across the UK.
Nicholas Hytner, Director, National Theatre
I'd bring the entire Casa de Pilatos from Seville, with its gardens (and preferably its weather). It is probably the most beautiful townhouse in Europe, a wonderful melange of Moorish, classical and Gothic. I'm a sucker for the kind of house that invites you to imagine the lives that have passed in it. Andalucian houses demand an imagination that extends well beyond the European norm, and this one's the best.
Mark Jones, Director, Victoria & Albert Museum
It is quite impractical, of course, but the object I would most like to see here is The Well of Moses by Claus Sluter. Dating from 1395-1405, this is the greatest work of one of Europe's greatest sculptors; remarkable for its formal, expressive and spiritual power. Yet its position, in the remains of a Carthusian monastery now surrounded by a large psychiatric hospital on the outskirts of Dijon, means that it is still little known. If we could show it alongside the Limbourg brothers' Belles Heures du Duc de Berry and Van Eyck's Ghent altarpiece, the absurd but still widespread view that art was reinvented in Italy might finally be laid to rest.
Jude Kelly, Artistic director, Southbank Centre
I'd like to bring the controversial West Bank wall in Bethlehem, which has been painted by Banksy and 30 other artists, to be shown as a temporary installation in central London. The artists have painted the barrier around Bethlehem as part of a project called Santa's Ghetto
This area in Bethlehem has always had some of the best resistance graffiti, and I think it would be a shock if we were to encounter and understand the vast scale and nature of this apartheid canvas - currently 200 miles long, and planned to be 425 miles. The artists' graffiti allows us to understand the wall, which is considered illegal by the UN, as a vast installation for protest. Maybe we could erect the wall for a month as a powerful artistic statement, cutting off one half of central London from the other. It would force the kind of debate around freedom of expression, human rights and national security that Mark Wallinger's recent Turner prize-winning installation was also trying to provoke.
Nicholas Kenyon, Managing director, Barbican
This is an absurd and impossible dream, but there is no artwork I would rather bring here than the fifth-century mausoleum of Galla Placidia, a tiny and almost unbearably moving chapel in Ravenna. Around its ancient tomb, the richly varied mosaics are the finest in the western world, with a barrel-shaped vault of deep blue stars, the piercingly golden symbols of the four evangelists, the symbols of Christ as shepherd, surrounded by sheep and doves, and the fantastically contemporary graphic designs of the barrel vaulting. It would show that there are universal messages of beauty that span the ages, which range far beyond a single religious tradition. We could place its brilliance here in the classic modernist environment of the Barbican, or it could transform the Tate's turbine hall or sit within the landscape of the wonderful Yorkshire Sculpture Park. There might be more practical imports to our shores, but none more powerful.
John Leighton, Director general, National Galleries of Scotland
It is easy to fantasise about retrieving works of art that have been lost or destroyed, or which are in some way out of bounds. But here is a project that is still feasible, if immensely difficult to realise. Towards the end of his life, Vincent van Gogh made 13 pictures, all on the same size of canvas - 50cm by 100cm. The paintings are diverse in style and subject matter. They include the famous Wheatfield with Crows and the even more powerful Wheatfield beneath Thunderclouds, works that are often viewed as anticipating his suicide. The pictures are now scattered in public and private collections across the world. Yet I am convinced that Van Gogh intended these 13 works to be seen as an informal series, evoking the cycle of nature and his fascination with growth, death and renewal as expressed in subjects like the harvest and the working of the land. The fragile condition and the rigours of modern conservation probably make it impossible to borrow these works today. But if we could bring them together, we would see the painter at his best, using vivid colours, bold brushwork and flowing rhythms to evoke both joy and sadness, achieving an intensity of emotion that is rarely paralleled, even in Van Gogh's work.
Ken Livingstone, Mayor of London
Guernica depicts the atrocities of war on an innocent civilian population. This painting, created by Picasso for the Spanish Pavilion at the Paris International Exposition in 1937, expressed the artist's "abhorrence of the military caste which has sunk Spain in an ocean of pain and death".
The work represents the suffering and destruction caused by the bombing of the ancient Basque town of Guernica on April 26 1937, by the Nazi German air force in support of Franco's Nationalists during the Spanish civil war. It was the first major military attack on civilians executed from the air - unfortunately, the first of many. More than 1,500 people were killed and hundreds were injured.
This painting encapsulates a universal story - the destruction and horror of war. That horror has only increased as the technology of killing has advanced through the 20th and into the 21st century. In this, the 70th anniversary year of the destruction of Guernica, I would choose to bring Picasso's masterpiece to London, because its message is as relevant today as at the time it was created.
Grayson Perry, Artist
I would like to see a major exhibition of the work of Henry Darger come to Britain. We have sporadically seen a few of his paintings in the UK since his death in 1973, but never a good representation of this genius of outsider art. Like the finding of Tutankhamun's tomb or the Terracotta Army, the discovery of Darger's life's work is equally dramatic.
Luckily for us, Darger's landlord Nathan Lerner was a designer and photographer and recognised that he had found something extraordinary when he went to clear out the hospital janitor's room after his death.
What he discovered was a complex metaphor for the interior life of a traumatised man - huge volumes of double-sided paintings and collages up to 12-feet long that illustrate his 19,000-page novel, The Realms of the Unreal. They chronicle the adventures of his heroines, the Vivian Girls, who led the child slave rebellion. Disturbing, beautiful, funny and surprisingly sophisticated, these are masterpieces from outside of the art world and a chronicle of survival. As well as his paintings, I would love to see a recreation of his room in Chicago, with its piles of clippings, comic books and Catholic mementoes, along with the desk and chair where he worked and slept his whole adult life.
Charles Saumarez Smith, Secretary and chief executive, Royal Academy
There are two groups of works that it would be wonderful to see together: the first is the two versions of Leonardo's Virgin of the Rocks, one in the National Gallery and the other in the Louvre; and the other is the three versions by Uccello of The Battle of San Romagno, one in the National Gallery, one in the Louvre and the third in the Uffizi. It would be wonderful, but probably will never happen.
Simon Schama, Art historian
As magic carpet jobs go, this one can't be too hard: three from Vienna, one each from Prague and New York; the surviving five of six calendrical scenes Pieter Bruegel the Elder painted for the Antwerp merchant Niclaes Jonghelinck in 1565. Put them together in a smallish room and what you get is not just a rural round of the seasons from deep snow to lush harvest, but an entire picture of the human condition. The whole world is cobbled together here in miniature, as if Bruegel were its Creator surveying from a magisterial height.
In The Dark Day, the landscape stretches from snowcapped alpine peaks to the thatched roofs of a Flemish village; a southern sea is warming at the horizon. Nothing about the cycle is sentimentally rustic. God-like Bruegel summons the elements to test human mettle: the slicing cold of deep winter through which the hunters push a path to get sustenance for their bodies, the ferocious February storm welling up in a dark sky, while wattle-cutters do what has to be done to get to pancakes and the spring. When the May breezes arrive in Haymakers, you register them on your body as the pannier-bearers walk springily along, their gait as musical as birdsong. Come the Wheat Harvest, backs are still bent, gleaning bums are stuck in the air, but the dominance has been reversed; toil in the background, but in front, the gorgeous plumpness of the world.
Amanda Sharp, Co-director, Frieze art fair
It would be great to see Jeff Koons's Puppy in Britain. The 45ft baroque topiary terrier is cute as a button, lolling on its haunches, waiting to be petted. Koons sees the piece as a spiritual work, joyous and pure. The sculpture was first presented during Documenta in 1992, independently of the exhibition in a small town 25 miles from Kassel. As an act of rebuttal, it effortlessly upstaged the grand exhibition. Puppy shows that great art can be a crowd-pleaser. It is possibly the most painterly sculpture ever made, and has been exhibited in New York at Rockefeller Center Plaza and in Sydney outside the Museum of Contemporary Art. It has a permanent home as the mascot outside the Guggenheim in Bilbao. I wish I could see it every day, or at least every summer. In nice weather, it takes on a different life as the plants bloom - it would look perfect in one of London's glorious parks.

Facebook meets its Match with dating site

The world's largest internet dating site will today launch Little Black Book, an application which puts Facebook users who are looking for a date in touch with other single members of the networking site or with Match.com's members. It will be the first liaison between a major dating firm and a social networking site.
The move comes as matchmakers come under pressure from social networking sites such as MySpace, Bebo and Facebook, where singletons can meet potential partners for free. Networking sites have only been around for less than five years but they already dwarf dating sites, with Facebook claiming about 58m members compared with Match.com's 15m built up since 1995. Jason Stockwood, Match.com's managing director for international business, says Little Black Book is part of a strategy to step up the dating site's expansion.
He says: "Match.com has a lot of the characteristics of social networking sites such as peer-to-peer communication and visitor-generated content. This bridges the gap between what social networking does well - a large network of people staying in touch - with our additional functions on top."
He adds: "Our experience tells us that social networkers have a high propensity to try online dating, which makes this a natural move for us."

Match.com wants to build relationships with other social networking sites and Mr Stockwood says the Facebook launch is a test to examine how such tie-ups can work.
Little Black Book will also be a trial for a new style of payment system under which members pay per contact made rather than via subscription.
Mr Stockwood, a Grimsby boy who claims to have met his girlfriend of two years in a pub rather than online, was poached from Travelocity, the travel website, nine months ago to help drive expansion and raise the profile of Match.com's brand in Europe.
The firm, which is owned by US-listed InterActiveCorp (IAC), wants to launch new niche brands and is also seeking acquisitions in the UK and Europe to help encourage a wider public to have a go at online dating.
The firm already has sites in 37 countries worldwide, including 15 European nations, and sees this side of the Atlantic as the engine of growth over the next few years.
"IAC is very acquisitive and has a huge amount of cash on the books," Mr Stockwood says. "We are looking at acquisitions in the UK and for potential targets to really help us consolidate the market."
Match.com, which bought UK-based rival Udate in 2003 and also runs unbranded dating sites for MSN and Yahoo, is no doubt hoping to harness Mr Stockwood's experience at the highly acquisitive Lastminute.com to help it find ideal partners. The online travel agency, where Stockwood spent five years, bought 16 companies over a two-year period.
Mr Stockwood says: "I think we are at the start of a hockey stick of growth for online dating. The concept is right, people understand it, but it has not reached a critical mass in being everyone's choice of how to meet people. I feel the opportunities are the same as at Lastminute.com - it is the start of something."
At present only 6pc of internet surfers use online dating sites and the paid-for dating market in the UK is only worth between £60m and £70m.
However, it is growing rapidly. The number of single people in the UK is expected to rise from 10m at present to 16m by 2012 and across Europe total revenues from online dating are expected to more than double to €549m (£395) by 2010 compared with €243m last year.
Match.com, which faces increasing competition in the UK from French-owned DatingDirect.com as well as Sarah Beeny's Mysinglefriend.com, launches a major TV and billboard advertising campaign this week as well as its new Facebook site.
The moves are intended to grab as big a share of the market as possible during the peak dating season. Boxing Day and the day after New Year's day are among the top 5pc busiest days for dating services as singles look for a new start after a lonely Christmas.
But the main challenge for dating sites is to encourage more people to overcome their shyness and seek a partner online.
New gimmicks such as video dating and the involvement of friends and family on sites such as Mysinglefriend.com are all being used to encourage singles to sign up. However, there is still a certain resistance to the concept of meeting a partner online.
Mr Stockwood says: "People in urban areas like London understand the benefits and there is a wide audience. The whole social stigma has gone, but many people still think it is not for them. People say it takes the romance out of meeting someone, but people over the age of 30 find it increasingly difficult to meet a partner."
A philosophy graduate who casts himself as a socialist, Mr Stockwood says he is "evangelical" about the power of the web as a way to build social groups and help like-minded people to find one another.
He says the link-up with Facebook is just part of his plan to make Match.com more accessible.
Also on the agenda are big events that will follow on from this year's world record snogging attempt at the Glastonbury festival which involved 400 couples.
"I want to bring the brand alive off-line beyond the ads and the TV," Mr Stockwood says.

Tequila Finds Love on MTV Dating Show

NEW YORK (AP) — Tila Tequila is taking a shot at love with a dude.
The bisexual Internet celebrity selected 25-year-old film student Bobby Banhart as the winner of "A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila," her popular MTV reality dating show, instead of 29-year-old female firefighter Dani Campbell.
"I do love Dani, and we've gone through so much together," Tequila said during Tuesday's finale. "But I am in love with Bobby."
Tequila — whose real last name is Nguyen — chose Banhart on a platform in the middle of the pool at the mansion where the reality show was filmed. Campbell walked away immediately following Banhart's selection, but Tequila ran after her to hug her and say goodbye.
"I thought we had something real. I thought we had a big connection," Campbell said. "I guess I was wrong."
"A Shot at Love," which featured 16 men and 16 women competing for the affection of the 26-year-old MySpace pinup, became MTV's second most popular series, just behind "The Hills," according to Nielsen Media Research.
Casting notices have circulated online for a second season of "A Shot at Love" and "That's Amore!" — a new dating show starring "Shot at Love" castoff Domenico Nessi. MTV hasn't confirmed that either is in the works, but Tequila told The Associated Press last week that MTV had approached her about taking another "Shot at Love" — although it doesn't look like she needs to.
"I came into this hoping to find love," Tequila said, "and I did."
A reunion of Tequila and the contestants will air Dec. 23.

Dating website in Facebook tie-up

Dating website Match.com hopes to net new customers by becoming the first major match-maker to partner with social networking site Facebook.
The move comes as analysts argue free social networking sites pose a major threat to subscription services like Match. Some dating services have already exited the market as sites like Facebook and MySpace rapidly grow their non-paying audiences keen to make new cyberfriends. Others matchmakers have sought to become more like networking sites by introducing chat functions and video clips.
But dating sites argue the social networking phenomenon has actually helped them grow their overall audience by breaking down people's inhibitions about meeting online.
Match.com is now partnering with Facebook in its bid to gain more networking-crazy surfers. The dating site is offering a "Little Black Book" application to Facebook users from next week, which helps them find potential partners.
"As the market leader, our biggest strategic challenge is to grow the category and our experience tells us that social networkers have a high propensity to try online dating, which makes this a natural move for us," says Jason Stockwood head of the UK Match business.
"Match.com shares many of the same characteristics as a social network, both are about bringing people together. Sites like Facebook are great at helping people manage their existing relationship networks, but Match.com helps people expand these, by meeting new people with an interest in forming romantic relationships."
The Little Black Book service marks a departure from Match.com's subscription model and will give customers the chance to meet its members on a 'pay-per-contact' basis.
The application also seeks to build on evidence showing friends's opinions play a key role in dating, something at the core of TV presenter Sarah Beeny's Mysinglefriend.com. That site allows users to sign up single friends.
Using the Little Black Book application, friends can share potential matches with any of their other friends on Facebook and can purchase keys to "unlock" a potential match for a friend.
Match's announcement follows new research last week showing the UK leads Europe in using social networking sites. UK adults go on social networking sites an average 23 times a month and spend longer on them than their European neighbours - an average 5.3 hours a month, according to media regulator Ofcom.

Dating site hopes to attract younger viewers with videos

PALO ALTO, Calif. -- Many online dating sites seek to connect soulmates, to bring together those looking for eternal and everlasting love.
The latest Internet dating site, recently launched in Palo Alto, is not one of them.

"It's not about marriage," said Alex Gurevich, cofounder of SayHeyHey.com, the first free all-video online dating site.
The new site eschews the typical format of online dating sites where users carefully word profiles and post photos "from 10 years and 20 pounds ago," Gurevich said.
Instead, users of SayHeyHey post videos of themselves talking, wakeboarding or -- in one person's case -- using a beer bong.
If a visitor is interested in someone else's clip, he or she can send a video introduction. The goal of the site is to connect with the 18- to 28-year-old audience that's more comfortable with YouTube than with Match.com, Gurevich said.
"If I'm a twentysomething, I don't want to be on a site with old fogeys," said Gurevich, 24, before apologizing to cofounder Soudy Khan, who described himself as "thirtysomething."
The two admitted the idea for the site stemmed in part from their collective dating woes.
Gurevich recalled a date he went on with a woman whose profile described her as laid-back and relaxed. After their first date, though, she hit him with a wave of frenzied calls and text messages.
"I was on JDate, and I went on two or three dates, and every single girl turned out to be super-psychotic," Gurevich said.
Video clips provide much greater insight into a person's personality, Khan said.
On the site, users can post as many videos as they want, with each one up to 10 minutes in length and most averaging around two minutes, said Gurevich.
And those hoping to find a date can click on the "matching" function, which locates a compatible personality, using a top-secret but "very deliberate" algorithm.
Gurevich said the matching formula works so well that it keeps trying to set him up with a woman he dated before the site's launch.

Truth About Dating: Readers 'tell Steve'

By Steve Penner
December 14, 2007 6:00 AM
Here we are, in the midst of the holiday season, surrounded by a seemingly never-ending barrage of Rachael Ray commercials, tree lighting ceremonies, shopping trips, crafts fairs and, one hopes, get-togethers with friends and family.
Each of us celebrates the season in our own way. As I wrote last week ("Remember single friends at the holidays") —¦the holiday season is a very intense time of year that tends to magnify one's personal level of happiness or unhappiness."

Two responses to that column show how people perceive the written word from their own perspective. One woman e-mailed:
"I just wanted to thank you for your recent article ...; It very much hit home for me — a year and a half ago my husband deserted me after 15 years together and left me penniless, am just coming off of very tumultuous divorce, this will be second Xmas/holiday season since it happened, and it is still so incredibly hard. What you wrote is so true — the holidays do tend to 'magnify' the loneliness/emptiness that one (at least me) feels in these situations. Mine was made worse by the fact that my ex-husband's family and our mutual friends all stopped speaking to me as soon as he left — not contacting me, and not responding when I tried to contact them — they basically acted as if I fell off the earth. At Xmas he and I always used to get at least 20 or 30 Xmas cards — last year (aside from my immediate family) I got a total of one Xmas card. That hit me very deep...;"
But another woman wrote:
"Your article last week is contributing to the myth that all single people are lonely, pitiful things. PLEASE. So not true. My single friends and I look at the overweight miserable marrieds and pity them for having to put up with crappy relatives and staged family events that no one really wants to go to. Single women and men have the freedom to do whatever the heck they want to during the holidays. I read and talk to friends all over the country. I have friends over or they have me over for laughs and wine. I have a few businesses that I work on during my free time because I enjoy it. I take the time to visit my elderly friends and catch up on movies — whether staying in or going out. Sometimes I take a trip to Barnes and Noble and stay there for hours reading and buying new books and listening to new music — never worrying that I have to be home by my curfew. If you're comfortable in your own skin, being single is very freeing and fun."
Well, to each her own. But as I originally wrote, single men do not get together for "laughs and wine" (unless the Patriots are playing).
In response to another recent column, "Don't ignore your bio clock," one woman e-mailed:
"Wanted to say that your article was appreciated. All too often, women do not realize their 'waiting until their schooling is complete,' then starting their career before they have children can really put a damper on childbearing. Ask me I know! Due to waiting too long, I had to have a radical hysterectomy at age 36, never to be a mother. Then come to find out, there are MANY in the world saddened as I am. Myself and a friend...; created www.childlessnotbychoice.com.
"Many of our members fit the descriptions in your article. Other scenarios included spouses not wanting (more) children since they had them w/a previous wife; some spouses just do not want any; do IVF after IVF (in vitro fertilization) to still come up empty-armed; failed adoptions, etc. Nonetheless, I wanted to commend you for writing what you did. If those women who 'wait,' wait any longer, they'll end up NEEDING our Web site. WE are an 'ilk' unto ourselves. WE are a misunderstood segment of society."
I hope everyone, whether single or married, childless or not, can make the best of the next couple of weeks. For so many people, the term "Merry Christmas" rolls off the tongue with the same reflex-like response of a well-trained store clerk saying "Have a nice day."
So the next time you say "Merry Christmas" to a friend, relative or acquaintance whom you know is going through a rough patch, think about what you can do to add real meaning to those words.
Steve Penner was the owner of the Boston-based dating service LunchDates for nearly 23 years and interviewed and listened to feedback from thousands of single men and women from all over New England. "The Truth about Dating" reflects insights and observations based upon his experience. Steve welcomes feedback at pennerst@hotmail.com or through his Web site at http://thetruthaboutdating.com.

Dating site matches couples by body odour

An American dating company claims to have cracked the secret to physical attraction and finding that perfect match – body odour.
To the founders of ScientificMatch.com, love is simply a matter of chemistry. It asks members to submit a DNA sample – the saliva-swab commonly used in paternity or drug testing – and then analyses it to calculate their ideal partner.
This will be someone with “a natural odour you’ll love, with whom you’d have healthier children and a more satisfying sex life”, says the company, which claims to be “the only introduction service that creates matches with actual physical chemistry”.

The process works, the founders say, because DNA analysis enables scientists to match people with compatible immune system genes – ie, those with different immune systems with whom they would create babies with more robust immune systems.
And the company claims: “The fact is, we love how other people smell when their immune systems are different from ours – they smell sexier.”
Members, who are charged close to £1,000 for the service, are also asked fill out a questionnaire on their “fundamental, core values” so they can be matched to people who share their beliefs, a process the company likens to “soul matching, or values matching”.
The service has so far been launched in the Boston area, which is seen as a fertile market because of its large number of single people - around 39 per cent of the population, according to local surveys.

Teen dating violence leads to risky health behavior

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - Teens who have suffered violence at the hands of an intimate partner are more likely to display a number of risky health behaviors, from disordered eating to suicidal thoughts, research shows.
"There isn't one specific behavior or concern that seems to arise from adolescent dating violence," study researcher Dr. Diann M. Ackard of the University of Minnesota, Minneapolis, told Reuters Health. For example, girls who've been abused on a date don't always develop eating disorders. "In general, what we've found is that adolescent dating violence puts young individuals, both girls and boys, at risk for a myriad of health risk behaviors," Ackard said.
As many as 1 in 5 female adolescents and 1 in 10 males have been abused physically or sexually by a dating partner, Ackard and her colleagues note in the Journal of Pediatrics.
To understand how this violence might impact teens' mental health, the researchers analyzed data from Project EAT, a study of eating behaviors and weight related issues in adolescents. They compared 23 boys and 102 girls who reported having experienced dating violence with 671 male and 720 female adolescents with no history of intimate partner abuse. Study participants were surveyed in 1999 and again in 2004.
Both boys and girls who had experienced dating violence were more likely to display three or more of 10 behavioral and psychological health problems, including binge eating, cigarette smoking, alcohol or marijuana use, depressive symptoms and low self-esteem, the researchers found. The relationship was particularly strong for girls.
Parents, educators, health professionals and others who work with adolescents should be aware of dating violence, Ackard said, and should also understand today's teens have their own language for talking about sexual relationships, for example "hooking up" or "hanging out."
She suggested that gauging the quality of teens' relationships by asking them how they feel when they are with a partner can help parents and others spot whether a girl or boy is at risk of abuse.
It's also important not to assume that all dating relationships will be heterosexual, or that the victims of dating violence are always female, Ackard said, noting that "there certainly have been instances in which the female partner in a relationship is doing more of the violent acts than the male."

Dating? Use common sense in your holiday gift-giving

A couple of years ago, as Christmas neared, Devan Carter and his friend sat down and talked about what they would give each other for the holiday. Though they did not call each other boyfriend and girlfriend, they had been dating for a while -- six months. And as a result, they decided to go all out, Carter says.Or so he thought.Carter, now 19, gave her a bracelet, some clothes and other gifts, $300 worth of stuff, he says. What did he get?

"She gave me a hat," he says.With the holiday season in full swing, questions of whether to give, what to give and how much to give hang over people's heads like mistletoe in the doorway. How do you navigate the gift-giving season without hurting your relationship?"Part of it is people have to use common sense," says Peter Post, author of Essential Manners for Couples and a great-grandson of the queen of etiquette herself, Emily Post. "Look at the relationship, and see how long you've been committed to the relationship."He says you likely should take it easy if you've met your S.O. (or potential S.O.) recently."I think probably if you have one date with a person, a diamond is a mistake," he says laughing.When it's new, Post says, it's better to approach the idea as if you're giving a gift to a good friend.A CD of a band or music genre they really like, a book or poster are good beginning-relationship gift ideas, he says."Keep the romance or personal statement out of the gift," he says.Thom Reznik, 28, of Hanover, did that when he and his wife of three years started dating, which was around the holidays. He gave her chocolates and a little teddy bear."Especially for Christmas, if they celebrate Christmas, you should give them something," he says. "Even if it's small."Ronnie Pulley, 19, of East Baltimore, says it's not a matter of whether to give, but what to give.One year, he gave a woman a bath set."She tried to play it off, but I knew she didn't like it," he says.Post says you can avoid displeasing people if you try your best to think about what they would want, rather than what you want."I'm going to make a conscious effort about your interests, how you live your life," he says. "I'm not going to buy a French maid outfit for fun. That's for me."And beyond the material goods, focus on the words, Post says. Give a card with your gift and write down how you feel."The word that underlies all that we're talking about is 'sincerity,' " he says. "If you do it within your heart, it's going to be received well."Nidhi Goel, 26, of downtown Baltimore, got more than she gave one year, for Valentine's Day. The guy she'd been dating for about four months gave her concert tickets. She gave him a cactus.But he says her boyfriend didn't mind; it was the thought: "He always killed plants," she says. "... You can't kill a cactus."Though it is a cliche, the adage is true: It's the thought that counts. Beyond price and relationship length, it's all about the feeling and intent behind the gift."The point of the gift is to give out of your heart," says Pulley, "not to expect something equal in return."Carter of East Baltimore agrees. He says he broke up with his not-official-girlfriend not long after Christmas, but that the gift disparity was not a big deal. He has no regrets about giving her the gifts, he says."I give because I can," he says. "Not because I must."

Single Shot: Online dating really sucks -- your time

By DIANE MAPESSPECIAL TO THE P-I
Like many people, I've been Christmas shopping online, surfing around on Amazon, Abebooks and what I've always referred to as "eBoy." What can I say? I decided to get a little something for myself, too.
I've tried online dating before and had mixed results: a handful of mildly pleasant misses, one real stinker (I still remember his snide "thanks for nothing!" post dinner, sans sex), and a pretty decent click that lasted several months.
As a tool for meeting people quickly and efficiently, the online sites are hard to beat -- or at least they used to be. These days, they have so many flashy bells and whistles it's hard to see the forest for the tease.
Put simply, my toolbox runneth over.
A couple of years ago, all you had to do was upload a photo -- preferably one without a potted palm coming out of your head -- and type up some clever verbiage about who you were and what you were looking for. After a few days, you'd start chitchatting with your hottest prospects about sushi and snowshoeing, movies and the Mariners; after a few weeks, you'd have a handful of good, bad and ugly dating stories to share with your friends. It was simple, straightforward, streamlined.
These days, things are a little more complicated. You log onto a site and a flashing icon tells you that you have Three New Crush Alerts! Six guys have winked at you; eight others have added you to their hot lists. A relationship chemistry predictor has kindly alerted 300,000 members to the fact that you're a dictatorial conservative who's dying to get married and have kids (despite the fact your profile says exactly the opposite) and your personality type has been flagged as The Crusty Philosopher. Also, you owe some guy in Tukwila three roses and there's a virtual smell waiting for you in your inbox from somebody named DirtyDirk.
Now I know all these gadgets and geegaws are part of the exciting new Facebookization of the interweb. And, granted, some of the interactive stuff can be fun (I'm on a hot list!) even for those of us who grew up with a sock monkey -- as opposed to a mouse -- in our pudgy little fists. But at some point all the flashing lights and popping windows and winking icons that you have to wade through in order to find some poor sap who likes "Project Runway," Frank Sinatra and blondes with "a little extra padding" just seems a bit too much.
Who has time to create their own bling and record a video introduction and keep a dating blog and spend the day tossing out winks and roses and testimonials like some parade clown throwing candy to the kids? Who has the stamina to spend hours ranking photos and calculating their compatibility quotient and relationship needs via 1,001 personality tests?
Ah, the tests -- another recent innovation. These days, you can't even browse the, uh, merchandise without answering a barrage of questions about the length of your index finger, your capacity for spontaneity and the exact amount of time you want to be held, you know, afterward. Personally, I think it would be far more useful to ask how often you clip your toenails and yell at the neighbor's dog, but apparently the online dating gurus think it's more fun to focus on your self-esteem, work habits and doodling style. That way, they can pseudo-scientifically match you up with all the other neurotic perfectionists with control issues. (Click here for your NPCI icon!)
What's behind all these shiny new add-ons? Love, naturally. Love of money.
When online dating got started, it was touted as a speedy alternative to the time-consuming sifting and sorting one normally had to go through to find a decent date. Big business didn't pay much attention at first; computer dating was for freaks and geeks. But after the sites raked in that first billion, everything changed. Advertisers shouldered their way onto the scene like party crashers on New Year's Eve, and soon singles were able to not only find a date but book a vacation, pimp their profile and learn how to "catch and keep a man!" Shortly thereafter, the interactive onslaught began. The more time singles spent winking and linking and clicking and sticking, the more chance there was they'd spend some of that fabulous discretionary income.
As a result, online dating has gone from celebrated time saver to serious time suck. And as painful as it is to admit, I've been sucked right in with everybody else.
Mouse-happy monkey that I am, I've spent two weeks on two sites, and between all the winking and blinking and hot-listing and test taking and preference setting and blog surfing and personality matching and how-to-go-about-man-catching, I've barely had three conversations. And not one date.
So far it's been a pleasant but completely unproductive experience, though I now can say with some confidence (although apparently not enough) that I'm a workaholic extroverted feeler judger with a tendency for procrastination and exaggeration. No kidding.
Considering my capacity for distraction, I'll probably continue to link and wink and deliberate and delay until the cows come home (cash and otherwise). Maybe by March I'll actually go on a date.
But I'm not worried.
I recently stumbled onto a new tool that I'm going to start incorporating into my regular online routine. It's on the left side of my screen and is fairly simple to operate. It's called the "turn off computer" button and I think it might be just the thing to help me get out there and meet people.
I'll send you a link so you can add it to your favorites.
Diane Mapes is a Seattle-based freelance writer and author of "How To Date in a Post-Dating World." She can be reached at dianemapes@gmail.com. "Single Shot" runs every other Friday.

Report: Ethan Hawke Dating Former Nanny

NEW YORK — Ethan Hawke is dating the woman who used to be his children's nanny — when he was married to Uma Thurman — and has been for two years, the New York Daily News reported.
"They are incredibly in love," a friend of Hawke's told the News.
A second pal said: "Yes, they've been keeping a lid on this for some time."
Click here for the Daily News report
According to the News' first source, the former nanny, Ryan, contacted Hawke about a year after the split from Thurman to confess her feelings.
"She had nothing to do with the divorce, and they started seeing each other after she was no longer the children's nanny," said the friend.
In August, Hawke said being part of a celebrity couple can be hard on the ego.
"It's unfair when one person's career is taking off and the other is really suffering," the 37-year-old actor told AMC's "Shootout."
"What happens -- it's not that they're jealous of each other; it's that the person you share your life with isn't in the mood to support," Hawke says. "You want to have a pity party for yourself, but they're off to the Golden Globes and you don't want to go because everyone is going to think you are jealous."
/**/

Hawke and Thurman were married in 1998. She filed for divorce in 2004. The couple have two children.
"There's a certain geometry to life -- that life has a certain math equation to it and if you're never together, you can't build a home," Hawke says. "Joanne Woodward put her career on the back burner for that marriage (to Paul Newman) to last. And something's got to give."
Hawke received an Oscar nomination for his role in 2001's "Training Day." His film credits also include "Dead Poets Society," "Great Expectations" and "Before Sunset."
Thurman, 37, has starred in "The Producers" and the "Kill Bill" movies. She was nominated for an Oscar for her role in 1994's "Pulp Fiction."

Glenwood man releases documentary on pitfalls of Web dating

A recent MSN dating survey reported that more than 40 million Americans have dated online — a staggering 40 percent of the country's 100 million single adults according to the U.S. Census Bureau. Unsurprisingly, online dating safety has been a growing concern as more and more Americans log on and hook up. But at least one Glenwood Springs journalist has his sights set on exposing the common pitfalls of Internet dating, and highlighting easy steps people can take to protect themselves. Nick Isenberg, a local documentarian and valley resident since 1984, just finished a year researching and interviewing professionals and online daters, culminating in the DVD “Before you Commit: Internet Dating.” The DVD highlights a few cases of online dating that went horribly awry, and also explains how to tell if the people at the other end of your e-mail are who they say they are. “Quite frankly, you can prevent being killed with the information I have on my video,” Isenberg says. Isenberg is specifically referring to two stories that headlined the news earlier this year involving the murder of 22-year-old Brian Barrett and the suicide of 13-year-old Megan Meier, both of which apparently resulted from online correspondence with individuals claiming to be someone other than who they really were. Isenberg believes that if either had seen his video, they would still be alive today. “The best advice I offer is that to have a healthy relationship on the Internet, you have to understand what a healthy relationship is in the first place,” he says. “Also, there are so many easy things you can do to make sure people are who they say they are, like having a webcam or checking out online exactly where people's e-mails are coming from.” Relationship experts, psychotherapists, and domestic violence counselors were all interviewed, and offer specific information on identifying psychopaths and how to tell if a potential partner is violent. The video also offers specific information for gays and lesbians who date online, as well as tips for dating people who have been incarcerated. The documentary will be available for $19.95 at www.nickisenberg.com, as well as several coffee shops, bookstores and athletic clubs from Aspen to Glenwood Springs.

One psychologist said

That people keep coming back because of the odd strike; ie it is like wining every now and then while gambling or seeing other people win; it keeps you coming back; that goal just seems to be right infront of you. That is why lotteries have instant win prizes etc.

The hard part is realizing any of that. I pretty well had to give up on finding anyone before I slowed down enough to get anywhere. Before that I alternated between being remote and being so intense; nobody wanted to keep close.

One person posted that nobody will help you on your quest to change. But I can't swallow that. There are lots of gropus that are great for support; for working on depression or drinking problems or assertivness or a host of other problems. Friends will go so far and so will family. There are lots of people who want to help; but too much emotional intensity will drive them away.

I'm becoming a bit of a cynic.

I know women who meet guys thru the net; but I can't say that it works very well the other way. But for everyone, men and women, part of the solution is to have a life; to have interests; to be curious and to explore the world, perhaps by travel or reading or study or whatever. It is an aimless kind of thing. It gets you to no particular place quickly and it sure isn't a direct way to get dates. But it is a start and it gives one a purpose in life. It gives you something to talk about and share with others. There is nothing like being curious to help one ask questions. Similarily, there is nothing like some personal explorat- ion to give one something to talk about.

The idea

The idea of blacks and whites dating, once highly divisive, is now broadly accepted.

There also has been a steady decline in the number of Americans who say they have little in common with people of other races.

I wonder if women get foused like men?

They seem to be more fatalistic. They like to believe that it was either ment or not ment to be. Meanwhile guys try to set things up; create oportunities etc.

They just like to believe that they didn't try hard enough or did something wrong. Why do we have 1-900-big-boys? Well, guys like a direct solution to a known problem. It is just that all the guys who I know tend to be nice and educated and all; and it is not as if we ever really get any replies to our personal adverts on the net or in newspapers and it is not as if we get replies to our letters in response to someone elses advert.

We just keep on trying in various ways; but I'd never consider a phone chat line as good for much more than ego stroking noise. But it tends only to be that for the women since they are greatly out- numbered by the men.

Tell your someone

*Tell your someone that you'd like to go out with him. The worst that you can get is rejection.

*People online can be expert impersonators with hidden agendas. They may be anyone from pedophiles to drug dealers to undercover cops. I

*t's possible to have feelings for someone you've never seen, but keep your sense of humor about it and don't go too overboard unless and until you've met that person physically.

A lesson learned?

Again, I wholeheartedly agree - but for many of these folks, the dating scene is the immediate forum (for them at least) wherein their battle for personhood seems won or lost. Looking back now - in my own case, I feel I would have become a more mature, fully developed person - mentally and emotionally - had I spent *less* time getting involved with very unsavory women - merely to say I was 'dating' or 'in a relationship'.

If I had it to do over I think I might have spent more time - if I was on campus, in getting involved in various volunteer efforts. And - strange as it may seem, genuine relationships often blossom as a result of such involvement - in which 'dating' is not sought as an end in itself.

"Shy? Lonely?"

Why is it that on the shyness newsgroup all everyone wants to talk about is dating, dating, dating?! A lot of people have shyness problems in other areas of life and probably should deal with those first before they worry about finding the girl or guy of their dreams.

On top of it, because of this over fixation on trying to get a date, we have to put up with these intelligence-insulting I think some people are so fixated on the dating scene that they aren't very aware of how their shyness has affected them in other ways that maybe ought to be addressed more quickly.

Are you a divorced or widowed

Are you a divorced or widowed 40- or 50-something Middle Tennessean who's getting back into the dating scene?

If so, we want to talk to you about what's new in dating and what's different from the days before you were married. Are you suddenly thinking about sexually transmitted disease you've never had to consider? Do you have other health concerns? Are you noticing any positive mental health benefits to dating the second time around?

Instead of going to bars and restaurants looking for that special someone, get a helping hand by joining the ranks of the online dating community. According to Online Dating Magazine, more than 20 million people visit at least one online dating.

Check this hot site: www.bizdating5.com

Actor Orlando Bloom admits

LONDON: Actor Orlando Bloom admits that he has difficulties dating and finding the right woman in his life. Bloom, after splitting from long-time girlfriend Kate Bosworth, has been having trouble finding the right dates.

"I find the whole datingOrlando Bloom has been involved with some of the hottest women in Hollywood, but the actor insists that he finds the dating game “very hard”. London, May 18 (ANI): Orlando Bloom has been involved with some of the hottest women in Hollywood, but still have difficulty finding the special mate.

Dating Services are not for losers

Sexbots will be, though. When affordable high-quality sexbots reach the market, losers will no longer have to suffer the indignity of being reminded that your dating service is not for them.

You can look at a person better by meeting that person in real life. Reading about that person is a bit harder, but eventually we will all carry with us a direct mind link to the Internet so we can download full dossiers on anybody who will sit still long enough for a retinal scan.

But it won't be much use by then because we will have sex robots which will be better than any person we can just go out and attract.

The dating scene is changing

The dating scene is changing to keep up with busy young professionals. Head out to downtown Albany on almost any night of the week and you're sure to find attractive, single, young professionals who seem to be looking for the same thing.

Answer to the previous question.............

"The Talk" begins the first time your child asks, "Where did I come from?" Based on age you give the appropriate response. Example: To a five year old you would say, "You came from Heaven, and to get you down here on Earth with us, God put you in my belly. Then Daddy and I went to the hospital when God told us it was time and a doctor took you out of my belly."

In that scenario you did not lie, but it was the kind of truth a child could understand. Children should be allowed to date in groups at 12-13 years old. If its not a school night and there homework is done and they are making reasonable grades.

Dating...?

what's a good age to start dating? how do u know if ur ready? i sometimes feel like i want to start dating but i'm never sure. my parents won't let me start dating until i get to university, but i'm just wondering.

You think the dating scene can be cold and unforgiving?

It may not be half as frosty as the tempestuous relationship between two of the biggest players in the online dating business.The complaint offers a glimpse into the online dating world, which has grown into a big-money business, with only a few major players.

The biggest reason for rejection, it says, is that the applicant is married. Stunningly, nearly one-third of the company's rejects (30 percent) fell into this category. Others are blocked because they're younger than the minimum application age of 21 (27 percent) or because the applicant gives inconsistent answers (9 percent), based on responses to eHarmony's 258-question application.

"Speed-dating" for producers desperately seeking backers

CANNES, France (AFP) - "Speed-dating" for producers desperately seeking backers is the new buzz at the Cannes film market opening Thursday on the sidelines of the world's paramount film festival.

With 10,000 directors, distributors and producers on hand for a 12-day frenzy of deals worth an estimated billion dollars, the Cannes Market, the film world's biggest, works to keep its edge over rival trade fairs, its director Jerome Paillard told AFP

But how do you find them?

To learn from men who are already great with women, make it a point to go out to the hot spots in your area and simply WATCH what’s going on.Look for the really attractive women who are with guys, and how the guys are BEHAVING.It’s also a good idea to watch the guys who are picking up -- or TRYING to pick up -- women and see what they’re doing.Pay attention to the body language of these guys, and see how women respond to them. Also watch the gestures, and if it’s not too loud, listen for the voice tone of these guys, and make a note if women are smiling and responding positively or if they’re looking for an escape route.

Dating tests

Double blind tests are especially useful in testing peoples reactions but not much help in testing machines. If your worried that scientist are fudging the results don't be to concerned as the strengths and weaknesses of the dating methods are well documented. Scientist are unconcerned with the Creation - Evolution debate, for them it ended over 150 years ago when geologist discovered the multiple stratigraphic layers under the surface of the earth.

defending dating methods

I read an article defending dating methods. It seems the bottom line is, you can't just send a rock or fossil or what have you to a lab and get an accurate date. You have to have a dating expert collect the rock as well.
Is it too much to hope for a blind dating method (no, not as in a blind date)? You can send blood to a lab without knowing where you got the blood and find out all sorts of information from it. Will we ever get a dating method that can do similarly?

I am a 48 year old female looking

I am a 48 year old female looking for dating and friendship. I love chating on line and get to know people before meeting. My idea of a nice date is dining and dancing for the first date. Once we have made contact, I like to have fun and do all kinds of activities such as going to a movie, walking, bycicling, cooking and dining at home, fishing, hicking, bowling, reading, cross country skiing, travelling, sight seeing and the list goes on and on. I like talking about everything and anything except hockey. I find that sport utterly silly and violent.

Reality TV dating

Do "The Bachelor'' and similar programs that short-circuit old- fashioned courting represent a new trend in dating? Or are they fads, the work of cynical network programmers trying to lure large audiences during sweeps week?
Two experts are uncertain if "The Bachelor'' and other quick-date shows signal a new trend or if the trend is good or bad.

looking for men and women

I am looking for men who have similar concerns as myself about dating, relationships, and selecting a spouse. The purpose of this post is *not* to meet someone for an intimate relationship, rather for the purpose of discussing relationships via email. Eventually, I might like to form a small ( 6 - 20 people ) private mailing list for the discussion of these topics. Such a list would also act as a support group, and provide the opportunity for long-term friendships to develop.