That people keep coming back because of the odd strike; ie it is like wining every now and then while gambling or seeing other people win; it keeps you coming back; that goal just seems to be right infront of you. That is why lotteries have instant win prizes etc.
The hard part is realizing any of that. I pretty well had to give up on finding anyone before I slowed down enough to get anywhere. Before that I alternated between being remote and being so intense; nobody wanted to keep close.
One person posted that nobody will help you on your quest to change. But I can't swallow that. There are lots of gropus that are great for support; for working on depression or drinking problems or assertivness or a host of other problems. Friends will go so far and so will family. There are lots of people who want to help; but too much emotional intensity will drive them away.
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